Selfish response here (on 2 fronts). First, I do miss your essays. Your writing is gorgeous, and that alone inspires me to write. Second, it's tough to give myself the time and space to participate in classes with all of *my* other commitments (ironic, right?). The topics are great, the guidance is needed, it's just more time than I can give.
Non-selfish responses... You don't have to produce anything to be worth a paying subscription.
Your health matters to me. As a friend, I'm asking you to prioritize that so you'll be able to come back here and share things with me.
The world is a huge dumpster fire right now. Low engagement is not your fault. Nobody has the capacity or spoons right now. I think a lot of creators are struggling with their audiences dropping off, and in some cases that's how someone like me (easily overwhelmed) shuts down the chaos and clutter of life. In other cases they just have to respond to egg prices and make tough choices. Art will always be sacrificed early.
I am here, and I have no intention of leaving (pending the next EO obviously). I support you doing what you do best because I love being here to see how it happens, even if it's messy or infrequent. Because that's real, and it's worth my time.
Well, Robin, this made me cry from relief. I put so much pressure on myself, but I feel like I am moving in the wrong direction with the newsletter, for myself and for others. I haven't written a real actual essay in a long time, and that's how so many people found me in the first place. This is only much needed confirmation for me to keep writing what I need to write, which is often what others need to read, rather than trying to create something I think might conceptually be better based on some imagined idea of what makes a newsletter "worth it." It's not hard for me to come here and share myself, but sustaining classes is like pulling teeth, which is definitely information I need to absorb. And change course. Thank you for your kind words regarding my writing. I feel the same. Hopefully I can let myself belong here in a way that feels organic to me, and not manicured. I can't do the latter. <3 Thank you <3
I became a paid subscriber just based on wanting to be in reciprocity for your gorgeous, wonderful essays. That’s all I really want or need. I was excited about the Interior Gaze but definitely don’t actually have the brainspace for a class. I think there are a lot of subscriptions on this platform that are literally just to have full access to the writing and that is perfectly fine and you should do the writing you want because that’s going to feel good to you and to your readers and give you more time to take care of yourself!
Deeply grateful for this reflection. It tangibly calmed my system to read your words. I find myself continually grateful for the kindness you show here and your support. Sometimes I need permission to restore my energy and/or let myself show up...just show up. Which is how this newsletter began. ❤️
Thank you for saying what I was thinking too. I pay to support you, River, and whatever you want to write. I don't care about how often, what the topic is, or if you're offering classes. I'm just here. :)
I can't overstate how much that means to me, Caitlin. In our wild world it is a gift to feel supported for showing up as myself, when I can. Thank you for helping remind me of how wonderful this space is (bc of people like you, and the power and magic of writing and connection). ❣️
Non sollicited advice here, just my thoughts because I've been missing my writing so much since the end of the year that I had to reorganize my neurodivergent body/mind/heart:
1."How to move forward in a way that feels good for everyone." Been there. I remember that I no longer want to suffer from being a people pleaser. I literally HAVE to remember this to myself, otherwise I fall again.
2. I can't share anything good and nurturing if I don't enjoy my Art.Life. I finally managed to save time in priority for my writing far from screens. Being part of a meditative community with other poetry lovers has really helped me to also write for fun from poetry prompts.
3. For me, my motto is : Pleasure first. because that's where I take my energy from.
4. Little hurrah with the letter I sent today : the quickiest I've written and it's as valuable as the ones I take too much time to write "just in case of". To me this is the sign my recovery from PTSD is going well. I allow myself. I woke up this morning to write an essay for my current project. Nothing to share. I grow my seeds, in silence, at my own pace. I have planned a mini retreat for the next weekends instead of creating another workshop.
Cause if I don't allow myself to be imperfect, to be flexible with my options, to enjoy writing just for fun and not for any kind of productivity, how can people allow themselves?
As an artist, my responsability is to preserve safe space times where I can share with others and this can only occur if I take care of my Life.Art first. I don't want people to believe all I write is perfect, always rings a bell etc.
5. Question for my ego if nothing works: "what do you want to prove? Who do you want to please? What holds you back from diving into your thing and leave the rest?"
Take care as best you can, have fun. :) (money is a big trigger yes. Don't exchange your time for money, that can't work anymore. Things are not linear.)
Marion, what you have to say here is so vital and I am deeply grateful for your words, ideas, support, energy. All reminders I needed. Pleasure first!!! I am going to make this my next quote art project (bc I love making messy quote posters). I also really agree re: meditation. I do Vioassana through their Dhamma app.
The people pleasing is real, and at this point (as you can see from the lovely comments here) it is obvious that my need to do things for others is sometimes out of sync with reality (ok...most of the time). The essence of so much that you say here is that we can't create beautiful and real things in the world if we aren't nurturing ourselves, expressing from the inside. I say this all without criticism for myself here- so many much needed reflections from you. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and energy here- it helos re energize me and reminds me of the power of this sweet community.
Your writing is why I became a subscriber in the first place. I love your ideas for the classes, but if it’s too much or not the right time, it just isn’t. I will still subscribe and look forward to your essays. I don’t think Substack should be that much more than a place where writers can share their art. I rarely open the other functions of Substack, like the Notes or the home page scroll thing. I despise social media. If I’m scrolling, I am just not interested. Anyway, that’s only relevant to say that I’m here for the writing.
This reflection helps me a lot. Reading all these comments, including yours, and knowing that my work, just my writing and showing up and creating art and thoughts, is meaningful without any marketing or bells or whistles means everything. I do look forward to figuring out how to connect/teach through this medium in a way that is sustainable for me, but knowing that I can show up and just write, and that's enough for people (and me), means everything.
I became a paid subscriber because I get so much from your writing. I’m someone who is less likely to use additional tools or prompts, mainly because I’m a writer who comes to Substack to read. I just wish more subscribers were seeing you and signing up. I think you have great integrity and that gives me comfort; however, I would hate for that to read as you can’t make mistakes in front of your audience. Or can’t slow down. I love what you do! I want the moon for you.
I feel all of this deeply in my heart. It energizes me and connects me and reminds me of what this space can be when I allow myself to show up authentically- messily and honestly. I am reminded that my own showing up is an exchange of energy that can benefit a lot of folks who don't always feel heard (and benefits me). Grateful for your words, the time you took to write them, and so so grateful that my words and thoughts mean something to you!
I should have said this the other day when I first had the thought but I’ll say it now. When you shared with us that your schedule changed and you’d send essays out late, I thought: how refreshing! How refreshing for you to show up as your full imperfect human self and just say it how it is instead of pushing through. You say you don’t want to lose us, as persons, and to connect with us. To me, those glimpses of humanity and realness feel connecting. Just like this very real piece here.
Thank you so much, Hanna. The connections created here mean everything to me, and this is a good reminder that often these connections happen when I really show up as myself (messy, figuring-it-out) self. Because this is really what I want this space to be- one of learning and curiosity and making mistakes and feeling supported. For everyone. So grateful and glad you're here.
Hey River, Thanks for your vulnerability and bravery in asking your subscribers what we need from you. I subscribed for two of the funnels you've suggested you'd like to do more of: write more about the publishing process and your journey as a writer AND write more pieces engaging with cultural topics, which often get a big positive response. You're writing is fantastic. Keep on with those and I'm a happy subscriber. Take care of you. More important than ever in these uncerain times.
This is so helpful Leanne! Both the concrete feedback about why you're here and the much needed reminder/encouragement. Looking forward to writing more in this space and sharing thoughts with the amazing readers/people (like you) who show up here.
I think it would be totally fine for you to post bulleted lists of resources for essay writers. I for one, would absolutely love that! You should take care of yourself and not over do it, though I know it isn't really any of my business to even say such a thing. I am sure there will be plenty of people here waiting for you when you have the time and energy to come back. You've got a TON on your plate from what you've shared here. I can't imagine trying to do all those things at once! I totally get what you mean about having a hard time posting things that aren't perfectly polished and contain all of the things. I have that problem too. That's why I don't post much. It also means I haven't grown my audience, but that's ok with me. I need time to do my real writing and unfortunately Substack is a huge distraction from that. Basically what I'm trying to say is I get it. I think you've got a lot to offer and I like your writing and I would rather you take the time to post something you really enjoyed writing than just crank things out for the sake of appeasing people. <3
Thank you for these words, Natalie. This newsletter started over four years ago, and was really just me sharing my thoughts, things I love, ideas. It's a good reminder that the space doesn't have to change as my audience grows. And it is very good to know that lists and resources would be valued. I stopped doing that and I love curating those resources!
I'm not a paid subscriber but since you're asking, I wanted to share a tip I heard during a live pivot hour last month over with Amanda Hinton's Substack who prioritizes protecting your own writing and your mental health above all else. Part of the discussion centered around offering live sessions and she talked about how much energy they take. Could you cut back to once a quarter on those? It seems like you have a lot on your plate and while you may lose some subscribers it seems you'll likely get your numbers back up when you have energy again. Take care.
I've been there, constantly grinding to keep people happy. But at what cost? If you aren't balanced yourself, are you really serving them in the best way? This has, and continues to take a lifetime of learning for me. But it's worth it!
late to the party here, but I really value your newsletter and I’m happy to pay for it and this seems like a good time to tell you that. I started writing and reading on Substack in summer 2022, and yours was one of the first (or maybe the first?) newsletter that I paid for, about six months later. My background is also working class, so I really appreciate that you write from that perspective -- and also, as a class straddler I usually learn about new situations by lurking and watching. I subscribed to your newsletter in part because you’re so transparent about your process with everything related to Substack, and that’s so helpful to me! Including what you’re doing right now: describing in detail what you tried and how it worked out for you and why you might or might not keep doing it. I get that kind of disclosure might feel weird, I wanted to tell you that it’s rare and generous. I’ve gotten a lot out of the essays by other writers that you shared, and bulleted lists would be great. I wish I had time to engage more with your classes, I just don't. But as others have already said, I’m happy to support your writing in whatever form it takes. I want to read what you want to write. Solidarity!
Hanging here with you through time and space since 2021 River. Don’t worry at all, you are fully seen and accepted here within your lovely community. It’s exhausting being human on certain phases of overwhelm specially with difficult to manage health issues.
I have said it before a hundred times and I will say it again, please prioritise your health over everything else. Take plenty rest and I really hope you breeze through your term papers and book edits. 💜
Selfish response here (on 2 fronts). First, I do miss your essays. Your writing is gorgeous, and that alone inspires me to write. Second, it's tough to give myself the time and space to participate in classes with all of *my* other commitments (ironic, right?). The topics are great, the guidance is needed, it's just more time than I can give.
Non-selfish responses... You don't have to produce anything to be worth a paying subscription.
Your health matters to me. As a friend, I'm asking you to prioritize that so you'll be able to come back here and share things with me.
The world is a huge dumpster fire right now. Low engagement is not your fault. Nobody has the capacity or spoons right now. I think a lot of creators are struggling with their audiences dropping off, and in some cases that's how someone like me (easily overwhelmed) shuts down the chaos and clutter of life. In other cases they just have to respond to egg prices and make tough choices. Art will always be sacrificed early.
I am here, and I have no intention of leaving (pending the next EO obviously). I support you doing what you do best because I love being here to see how it happens, even if it's messy or infrequent. Because that's real, and it's worth my time.
Well, Robin, this made me cry from relief. I put so much pressure on myself, but I feel like I am moving in the wrong direction with the newsletter, for myself and for others. I haven't written a real actual essay in a long time, and that's how so many people found me in the first place. This is only much needed confirmation for me to keep writing what I need to write, which is often what others need to read, rather than trying to create something I think might conceptually be better based on some imagined idea of what makes a newsletter "worth it." It's not hard for me to come here and share myself, but sustaining classes is like pulling teeth, which is definitely information I need to absorb. And change course. Thank you for your kind words regarding my writing. I feel the same. Hopefully I can let myself belong here in a way that feels organic to me, and not manicured. I can't do the latter. <3 Thank you <3
I became a paid subscriber just based on wanting to be in reciprocity for your gorgeous, wonderful essays. That’s all I really want or need. I was excited about the Interior Gaze but definitely don’t actually have the brainspace for a class. I think there are a lot of subscriptions on this platform that are literally just to have full access to the writing and that is perfectly fine and you should do the writing you want because that’s going to feel good to you and to your readers and give you more time to take care of yourself!
Deeply grateful for this reflection. It tangibly calmed my system to read your words. I find myself continually grateful for the kindness you show here and your support. Sometimes I need permission to restore my energy and/or let myself show up...just show up. Which is how this newsletter began. ❤️
Thank you for saying what I was thinking too. I pay to support you, River, and whatever you want to write. I don't care about how often, what the topic is, or if you're offering classes. I'm just here. :)
I can't overstate how much that means to me, Caitlin. In our wild world it is a gift to feel supported for showing up as myself, when I can. Thank you for helping remind me of how wonderful this space is (bc of people like you, and the power and magic of writing and connection). ❣️
Sending you some loving kindness.
Non sollicited advice here, just my thoughts because I've been missing my writing so much since the end of the year that I had to reorganize my neurodivergent body/mind/heart:
1."How to move forward in a way that feels good for everyone." Been there. I remember that I no longer want to suffer from being a people pleaser. I literally HAVE to remember this to myself, otherwise I fall again.
2. I can't share anything good and nurturing if I don't enjoy my Art.Life. I finally managed to save time in priority for my writing far from screens. Being part of a meditative community with other poetry lovers has really helped me to also write for fun from poetry prompts.
3. For me, my motto is : Pleasure first. because that's where I take my energy from.
4. Little hurrah with the letter I sent today : the quickiest I've written and it's as valuable as the ones I take too much time to write "just in case of". To me this is the sign my recovery from PTSD is going well. I allow myself. I woke up this morning to write an essay for my current project. Nothing to share. I grow my seeds, in silence, at my own pace. I have planned a mini retreat for the next weekends instead of creating another workshop.
Cause if I don't allow myself to be imperfect, to be flexible with my options, to enjoy writing just for fun and not for any kind of productivity, how can people allow themselves?
As an artist, my responsability is to preserve safe space times where I can share with others and this can only occur if I take care of my Life.Art first. I don't want people to believe all I write is perfect, always rings a bell etc.
5. Question for my ego if nothing works: "what do you want to prove? Who do you want to please? What holds you back from diving into your thing and leave the rest?"
Take care as best you can, have fun. :) (money is a big trigger yes. Don't exchange your time for money, that can't work anymore. Things are not linear.)
Marion, what you have to say here is so vital and I am deeply grateful for your words, ideas, support, energy. All reminders I needed. Pleasure first!!! I am going to make this my next quote art project (bc I love making messy quote posters). I also really agree re: meditation. I do Vioassana through their Dhamma app.
The people pleasing is real, and at this point (as you can see from the lovely comments here) it is obvious that my need to do things for others is sometimes out of sync with reality (ok...most of the time). The essence of so much that you say here is that we can't create beautiful and real things in the world if we aren't nurturing ourselves, expressing from the inside. I say this all without criticism for myself here- so many much needed reflections from you. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and energy here- it helos re energize me and reminds me of the power of this sweet community.
Your writing is why I became a subscriber in the first place. I love your ideas for the classes, but if it’s too much or not the right time, it just isn’t. I will still subscribe and look forward to your essays. I don’t think Substack should be that much more than a place where writers can share their art. I rarely open the other functions of Substack, like the Notes or the home page scroll thing. I despise social media. If I’m scrolling, I am just not interested. Anyway, that’s only relevant to say that I’m here for the writing.
This reflection helps me a lot. Reading all these comments, including yours, and knowing that my work, just my writing and showing up and creating art and thoughts, is meaningful without any marketing or bells or whistles means everything. I do look forward to figuring out how to connect/teach through this medium in a way that is sustainable for me, but knowing that I can show up and just write, and that's enough for people (and me), means everything.
I became a paid subscriber because I get so much from your writing. I’m someone who is less likely to use additional tools or prompts, mainly because I’m a writer who comes to Substack to read. I just wish more subscribers were seeing you and signing up. I think you have great integrity and that gives me comfort; however, I would hate for that to read as you can’t make mistakes in front of your audience. Or can’t slow down. I love what you do! I want the moon for you.
I feel all of this deeply in my heart. It energizes me and connects me and reminds me of what this space can be when I allow myself to show up authentically- messily and honestly. I am reminded that my own showing up is an exchange of energy that can benefit a lot of folks who don't always feel heard (and benefits me). Grateful for your words, the time you took to write them, and so so grateful that my words and thoughts mean something to you!
I should have said this the other day when I first had the thought but I’ll say it now. When you shared with us that your schedule changed and you’d send essays out late, I thought: how refreshing! How refreshing for you to show up as your full imperfect human self and just say it how it is instead of pushing through. You say you don’t want to lose us, as persons, and to connect with us. To me, those glimpses of humanity and realness feel connecting. Just like this very real piece here.
Thank you so much, Hanna. The connections created here mean everything to me, and this is a good reminder that often these connections happen when I really show up as myself (messy, figuring-it-out) self. Because this is really what I want this space to be- one of learning and curiosity and making mistakes and feeling supported. For everyone. So grateful and glad you're here.
Hey River, Thanks for your vulnerability and bravery in asking your subscribers what we need from you. I subscribed for two of the funnels you've suggested you'd like to do more of: write more about the publishing process and your journey as a writer AND write more pieces engaging with cultural topics, which often get a big positive response. You're writing is fantastic. Keep on with those and I'm a happy subscriber. Take care of you. More important than ever in these uncerain times.
This is so helpful Leanne! Both the concrete feedback about why you're here and the much needed reminder/encouragement. Looking forward to writing more in this space and sharing thoughts with the amazing readers/people (like you) who show up here.
I think it would be totally fine for you to post bulleted lists of resources for essay writers. I for one, would absolutely love that! You should take care of yourself and not over do it, though I know it isn't really any of my business to even say such a thing. I am sure there will be plenty of people here waiting for you when you have the time and energy to come back. You've got a TON on your plate from what you've shared here. I can't imagine trying to do all those things at once! I totally get what you mean about having a hard time posting things that aren't perfectly polished and contain all of the things. I have that problem too. That's why I don't post much. It also means I haven't grown my audience, but that's ok with me. I need time to do my real writing and unfortunately Substack is a huge distraction from that. Basically what I'm trying to say is I get it. I think you've got a lot to offer and I like your writing and I would rather you take the time to post something you really enjoyed writing than just crank things out for the sake of appeasing people. <3
Thank you for these words, Natalie. This newsletter started over four years ago, and was really just me sharing my thoughts, things I love, ideas. It's a good reminder that the space doesn't have to change as my audience grows. And it is very good to know that lists and resources would be valued. I stopped doing that and I love curating those resources!
I'm not a paid subscriber but since you're asking, I wanted to share a tip I heard during a live pivot hour last month over with Amanda Hinton's Substack who prioritizes protecting your own writing and your mental health above all else. Part of the discussion centered around offering live sessions and she talked about how much energy they take. Could you cut back to once a quarter on those? It seems like you have a lot on your plate and while you may lose some subscribers it seems you'll likely get your numbers back up when you have energy again. Take care.
This is super helpful- I love Amanda and she always has such a great perspective on these things. A very helpful reminder. ❤️
I've been there, constantly grinding to keep people happy. But at what cost? If you aren't balanced yourself, are you really serving them in the best way? This has, and continues to take a lifetime of learning for me. But it's worth it!
hi! I'm sorry you're struggling. I've been feeling overwhelmed recently and it's not a nice feeling. I hope things calm down <3
But if you're still doing these, I would love to attend the silent writing sessions again, how do I do that?
Hi River,
late to the party here, but I really value your newsletter and I’m happy to pay for it and this seems like a good time to tell you that. I started writing and reading on Substack in summer 2022, and yours was one of the first (or maybe the first?) newsletter that I paid for, about six months later. My background is also working class, so I really appreciate that you write from that perspective -- and also, as a class straddler I usually learn about new situations by lurking and watching. I subscribed to your newsletter in part because you’re so transparent about your process with everything related to Substack, and that’s so helpful to me! Including what you’re doing right now: describing in detail what you tried and how it worked out for you and why you might or might not keep doing it. I get that kind of disclosure might feel weird, I wanted to tell you that it’s rare and generous. I’ve gotten a lot out of the essays by other writers that you shared, and bulleted lists would be great. I wish I had time to engage more with your classes, I just don't. But as others have already said, I’m happy to support your writing in whatever form it takes. I want to read what you want to write. Solidarity!
Hanging here with you through time and space since 2021 River. Don’t worry at all, you are fully seen and accepted here within your lovely community. It’s exhausting being human on certain phases of overwhelm specially with difficult to manage health issues.
I have said it before a hundred times and I will say it again, please prioritise your health over everything else. Take plenty rest and I really hope you breeze through your term papers and book edits. 💜