weaving the threads of ourselves into a beautiful tapestry; that’s writing

An inspiration touchstone

I’m writing from where I’ve been for the past three weeks: my bed. I am still without full use of my left leg and in a considerable amount of pain. On Thursday I meet with one of two neurosurgeons; I’ll meet with the other one next Monday. Apparently I have not only three slipped discs but also a narrowing of my spinal canal due to bone growths (I think??), which could lead to impingement of my spinal cord which…wouldn’t be a good thing.

I’m really glad I bought that marketplace insurance even though it is incredibly expensive.

Yesterday, I tweeted about despair. For me, despair is one of the most difficult emotions to metabolize. Frustration at my situation, my loss of function, my lack of community in the city where I currently reside, my absence of family. There’s this weird little glitch in my brain that clicks on whenever I think of how terrible things are- it says, “but it could be worse,” and “I’m lucky to have what I do.”

Both things are true, and yet. And yet can I acknowledge w…